A California Butcher Plays House.

Penthouse Letter 3 Butcher's Delight

I am a hard working guy.  I have read your magazine for years and never thought I would be able to write.  Now I can.

One of my customers comes in all the time.  She is a professional cook and housekeeper.  “Alice” is a real looker.  She comes in the store wearing her little house dress.  I have fancied Alice for a long time.  I am little shy though, so at first I would just make sure she got the best cuts of meat at my butcher shop.  It wasn’t much but if I saw a great rib roast come through I would save it for my Alice.

Finally, one day I got the courage to ask Alice on a date.  It was nice.  I was really nervous so I wore my best suit and arrived at the house where she lived.  She lived with a family of 8.  It was a little uncomfortable meeting them all but I got through it OK.  Our date went just swell and I finished by kissing Alice on the cheek.  I was really smitten.  Alice was a nice girl and I was happy to be her sweetheart.

One day my girl Alice came in the store.  She wouldn’t need a rib roast next week because the family would be in Hawaii.  “Could You Bring Over A Hot Sausage Instead” Alice asked with a wink.  I sure could.

After work on Friday I put on my bell-bottom jeans and my favorite plaid shirt and headed over.  When I arrived Alice was wearing only her bloomers.  She told me that she had a plan while her boss was away.  Seeing her wearing next to nothing I was ready for anything.

Alice’s plan involved doing it in all of the beds in the house.  We started with the bunk beds in the girls room, then we moved to the bunk beds in the boys room.  Next we went in to her boss’s bedroom.  They had an enormous bed.  Alice said in her years working there she didn’t think they had ever used it for anything but reading and sleep.  Alice thought her boss might be gay. 

After we had soiled the sheets in the master bedroom we moved to the couch in the den.  Making love in a two story room has always been a fantasy of mine.  I told Alice it was just like being outside.  Alice said she had more plans.  Before I knew it, we were outside trying to fit in Tiger the dog’s house.  Alice got down on all fours and tried to fit inside but I wouldn’t fit too.  We had to settle for her sweet ass sticking out the door while I plugged her.  Good thing they had a big fence around the back yard.

A couple of days later the Brady’s returned home and I haven’t seen that kind of action since.

Signed,

Sam The Butcher.